Such a Powerful Tool

the mind. the brain.

it's such a powerful tool. it can make you, it can break you. it makes you think of such complex situations/scenarios/fantasies. in turn, it will definately make you feel a vast array of emotions, whether they're good or not.

it's funny how yesterday, or rather early this morning, i was posting about hugs & all of a sudden i feel the urge to receive one, 'cuz frankly, i don't feel good about myself, & perhaps, maybe even the situation i'm in (probably something i won't want to elaborate on, so don't ask). it's frustrating.

maybe for the most part it's just the uncertainty that gets to me. uncertainty makes me think too much & as a result, it makes me pretty pessimistic & depressed. it makes me wanna cry sometimes, & truthfully, sometimes i do want to cry, but something is just holding it back. is it because i've been socialized to be masculine that i can't cry? boys/men aren't suppose to cry right? but isn't crying a good thing, a healthy thing, to just let your emotions run wild? it's not like i want to cry for no reason, there's a reason behind almost everything. *sigh*

i need a clear conscience. i need to get out. i need..something. i need something to repair the mind, repair the soul, repair the heart. something to repair me.

right now, life isn't so great. i'm an emotionally disturbed child. ha, funny, i have to leave for that class soon since it starts in about an hour.

adios.