Stage & Rage

alright, so i wrote this little blurb to myself just before i went to bed last night (Monday night), and yeah, just got me thinking about friendships, relationships and stuff of that sort. i think this summer has really taught me to open up my eyes to true friendships and things of that matter. all i know is that i could've been hurt badly this summer, but because i found out about the real situation before i made any moves, i was able to avoid the embarrassment, anguish, depression, and all that jazz that surrounds a rejection. *whew* grateful am i!

i just thought to myself and i ask, have you ever gotten to that stage where you are such great friends with another of the opposite sex that you'd go out with him/her, but at the same time you're ok if they don't return that feeling or just want to remain great friends??

i know that with some friends, i'd go out with them in a heartbeat if that's what they wanted, if they were interested, but i'm also ok with the fact that they wouldn't think of me in that same way or if they didn't want to go down that route. that's cool with me too. i think that defines a pretty great friendship. i think that's awesome. that's just me though. others may have different opinions on this matter.

this thought just had me reflecting back on some friendships i've had. some have taken the turn for the best, and some have taken the turn for the worst. and i think the latter has happened more often with me. well it's not like the worst, but what began as a great relationship just ended on a bad note 'cuz one party didn't return that feeling and everything just got awkward.

right now, i really cherish what i have. all the friendships that i have and have had. if those broken friendships i have now stay broken forever, well then, that's how God intended, right? He placed those ppl in my life for a reason, and their reason has been fulfilled, and that is to make me a stronger person for the future and now.

tonight, i spent some time with William and Rebecca. we went to play some tennis together, but had to cut it short 'cuz the lights wouldn't turn on. how do you activate them lights! boo! anyway, afterwards William dropped Rebecca and i off at my place, and we "watched" The Motorcycle Diaries. haha..watch is in quotes 'cuz we barely watched it, we were talking for most of the movie and we just gave up on it and just talked and talked. it was really nice to just sit there, and talk, one on one with no real interruptions, no noisy backgrounds, nothing. it's always nice to spend time with Rebecca! gonna miss ya when you go to Boston! :)

anyway, i can't leave you guys without bitching about something though. hahaha..i don't really feel the rage as i type now, but i'll copy and paste what i sent to myself earlier this morning. my day actually started off pretty badly. but then, it might just be me and my views. you guys may beg to differ. or maybe just don't think positively of my family.. :( i'm an ass.

anyway, so here's the excerpt i wrote earlier this morning.

sometimes i wonder what the heck goes through my sister's mind. my brother is a part-time worker here, you can't really force him to work a full day, besides, she only asks him to come out if they need him to do miscellaneous things. right now they do, but my sister is such an idiot sometimes.

anyway, he wants to leave work earlier, like maybe "half" day 'cuz he's going to watch wrestling tonight (Smackdown!) at the ACC. but because my sister is so freaking power-hungry, she said no, come for the full day or don't come at all. so, my brother doesn't come to work today.

i have to drive to work because i might be heading down to the Mississauga Store later today to prep the computers there for the Orlando Stores (still have NO idea when i'm going down and i'm getting annoyed by the uncertainty 'cuz i don't want it to cloud around tournament and banquet days because if i miss it, i WILL be EXTREMELY pissed off BEYOND belief).

so because of my sister's stupidity, i, myself have to work a half day now because i have to return the car so that my brother can take it for the night. *ARGH* so STUPID! like honestly, is it really that big of a problem if he's working half a day? at least he's coming out to do YOU a favour, y'know? like it's better that he comes out for just a half day rather than nothing at all! plus, i'd be working a full day, and someone can drop me and pick me up at the store. how freaking hard is that?!

i honestly don't understand her brain functioning sometimes. gosh..so annoyed.. :@

anyway, since i'm off at 3pm today, i'm going to get my haircut since my barber is pretty much right across the street from the Miss store. can't get it tomorrow or thursday 'cuz they're closed and i have tennis to watch respectively. friday, sat, and sun, are all not good days 'cuz they're busy, as am i..but..DAH HECK MANG! >:|

un-freaking-believable.

another sister story...on the same damn day. like HONESTLY..how freaking ignorant can you be?

you KNOW that i'm going to be going to the store to prep the US store systems. and i asked for an updated US price list, but you still print and edit the CANADIAN one and have the nerve to say that it's my fault for "saying" that i wanted any price list, so you automatically assume that i wanted a Toronto CDN Price list? if you're unsure, ask me. but honestly, where's the logic? i'm setting up the US store, and i'm going down to ORLANDO..like..what the hell is the use of a CDN price list to me? nothing! it just creates more work for me using the damn exchange rates and shit.

damn, so aggravating..wtf..i feel like going on a profanity-laced tirade!

so yeah, this morning, i was on a major bitch-fest. not healthy, i know. but i just had to get it out of my system. i never did end up going to the Mississauga Store like i said i was going to. i wanted to be prepared and then just go there and enter everything in one shot. so i just stuck around Boca until 3pm, got my haircut, and got home by 4pm. then just spent then until dinner time trying to figure out details about tonight with Rebecca. haha..so funny that when we don't have a car, we have so many ideas, but when we do, we don't have any. but anyway, everything worked out and the day ended on a better note.

i actually should head off to bed now, so g'nite y'all. DON'T FORGET TO VOTE! ;P hahaha