Pre-Dear John

i have lots of complaining to do..so this is me whining..deal with it..or not.

last night just as i was falling asleep, i was writing a "Dear John" letter in my head. i just remember that i was writing one, but i can't really remember what was thought. i should've wrote it down..oh well..all i know is that i was pretty bitter at some things that have unfolded in my life in the past year or so.

this weekend has been..dry. i didn't do too much, and then again, i didn't initiate anything either..i never do. i'm not the type of person to start things. i used to be. i quit trying to plan things and organize things back in high school because i didn't like doing that.

anyway, Friday, i didn't really do much except for that inventory stuff at work. in the evening, Gen came over and we watched a bit of Friday's portion of the NBA All-Star Weekend in Denver. Friday showcased the Rookie/Sophmore game. quit watching it halfway thru 'cuz we found CSI, so we watched that instead. then we watched Snatch. man, you CANNOT understand what the heck Brad Pitt says in that movie..freaking pikey.

Saturday wasn't that much better, i didn't leave the house except for at 9.30pm to go play some hockey with Steve and his church buddies. that was about the only highlight of my day.

Sunday, i finally got to see the new expansion at MCBC. pictures made it seems soooo much bigger, and when i was driving to church, i had like this big expectation for what it looked like and how big it was. i get there, and i almost walked into the Chapel instead of the new Sanctuary. HAHA! anyway, yeah, the pictures were deceiving, BUT it was still nonetheless big! it's really nice, and i really like the handmade cross with the blue (or is it purple?) background glowing light around it. very...artsy. :P i haven't seen the stain-glassed windows tho..i was looking for them. but yeah, overall very impressive! :D

it was nice to see everyone again today, lots of good chats and whatnot. lots of comments on my hair too. "wow, your hair is so long!" "when did you last cut it?" "are you still growing it out?" "you should tie it up in a ponytail!" "shave your head and leave the mullet!" hahaha...i'm cutting it soon. you'll see me with my "normal" hair so to speak next week probably.

after church, i came home for lunch and watched the 52 Greatest NBA Moments on SpikeTV..but i passed out. so i just went upstairs and passed out for a good 3hrs.

now that i've been home for almost 5 days, i think i'm ready to head back to Waterloo already. for some reason, when i'm at home, i feel so lifeless. and it seems that all i ever do when i come home is piss ppl off or disappoint them or vice versa. tonight, one of my sisters blantantly said (to no one in particular) "seems like some ppl always come to dinner half asleep." so i was thinking.."so what are you saying? can i not be tired?" man i can't bother to argue with her 'cuz in the end "i'm always wrong and she's always right." i wish i could just videotape her and show her how she treats us like crap. that'll be the day.

then i also get forced to do things that i don't even want to do, like work. it's like i'm expected to go into work without even getting an opinion. i'm grateful to my dad for giving me opportunities and jobs when i don't have or get one, really i am. but like, it's reading week, even tho it's techincally for us to study for school, most ppl take this week off to just relax. not me. i have to wake up at 6.45am to go to work at 8.15am and work the full day until 4.45pm. by then, i come home and i'm dead tired and won't want to do anything.

*sigh*..

ok i'm done..i should grab some more sleep as i'll need it. i think i'm gonna hate it when i graduate from Waterloo and enter the "real world." ugh....